Let’s dive deep and help you on your path to finding the right love.
Here are ways you can get support, teaching, tools… Join the SuperLOVED- The Art and Consciousness of Finding the One or sign up for this 30-day challenge or go to my website and see what classes are available or coming up. Some of you are clear that you like one on one the most, which I understand because that’s typically my preference, you can apply for that here.
SuperLOVED has a lot of ways to create your love story. Rather than feeling stuck, held back, limited, or like things aren’t possible for you, SuperLOVED systems and classes will create change in your life and lead you to love.
Let’s start by talking about putting a stop to judgments, inner critics, and limitations.
Putting a stop to judgments and limitations includes everything that we are deciding is right or wrong or good or bad. So it’s not about trying to be “positive” all the time at all.
So even the things that we’re saying are good, it’s a judgment that this is the right thing and that there is another side of that that is considered wrong. Ultimately, we are playing with how we get out of all of that so that we can be in a space of possibility, and awareness, and consciousness. So, I’m also inviting you to be part of my other Facebook group, I like to call the work that I do the art and the consciousness of finding the one.
And so much of what occurs when we find ourselves single later in life is that we’ve experienced some things that our mind has decided were the wrong choices. It becomes a collection of all of these judgments and limitations, that creates protective walls that are actually limiting us, like a lock on our heart that stops something greater to come in.
The way out is to be able to be present and aware. Not having to decide what’s good, bad, right, or wrong.
So what judgments do you have around yourself around dating?
Around being single?
Every judgment we have around ourselves or our relationship status, whether single or dating, all of those judgments becomes a brick in your body. It’s like you’re layering these bricks of judgment that become this wall against being able to receive anything else. So the more we can be aware of that, the more we learn to let go of the stories from the past around things not working or doing it wrong or picking the wrong person, or staying too long… the list goes on and on. All of the good and bad judgments become barriers because you’re stuck in the conclusion that there was a right way a right path that you did not choose. That’s a dead-end, trap, and is just a pile of poo. But when you are there, anything around you that doesn’t match the sad story, is invisible, can’t even be seen. So an amazing partner could be right in front of you and you wouldn’t even notice.
Getting beyond all this is about getting out of trying to get it right, it is knowing you are a powerful being trusting yourself, it’s opening up to a space that is beyond right or wrong. Learning how to identify the inner critics, and stopping them, and It’s being in a question of “what else is possible here?”
I look at my life and I can see that if I had met Larry (my husband now) even a year before I did the work I teach in SuperLOVED, I would NOT have noticed him or thought he was a match for me. So being aware of these judgments and learning to manage the inner critics is a game-changer for getting to extraordinary love.
The inner critics are those voices of judgment. So for example, you’re not good enough, you’re too old, you’re not skinny enough, you need to make more money, or like all of these, like pressure or voices that we can call the inner critics.
Here are some of the popular ones!
- The perfectionist,
- The pusher (you aren’t doing enough, you aren’t enough!),
- The people-pleaser,
- The hopeless one,
- all of those kinds of voices are the ones that build up these barriers that keep us from love and connections.
Over time, these kinds of self-defeating, self-flagellating words, even the good judgments, even the positive things that we say won’t help us. What we really want to get is gratitude for our body, kindness to our body, honoring our body and our life. And that kind of energy that just is not either good or bad. It’s gratitude, honor, and kindness.
So even in that, it’s helpful to just not go into any of those polarities and to be willing to be aware.
So what is awareness?
Awareness is just receiving all that is. Without a point of view, without having to label it, define it, or pick a side.
So let’s just play with this. As you read this be aware of your body/ Sense and perceive what’s occurring in your body right now. And your imagination will call your attention towards space or a place where the limitations live.It may be a collection of judgments, about you or against you, about your life or against your choices. Be aware of where you’re drawn to, in or around your body. And wherever that is, it may be the whole of you, it may be a part of you. Move your attention to that place or space, like you’re arriving closer to it, or arriving in it. And as you arrive or move closer to that space, your imagination is going to give you an image. And you may sense it or perceive it or actually see it in your mind. What is it?
What does it want you to know?
What is it here to provide you?
What happens to it when you hear it, and spend time with it? Does it change or stay the same?
Whatever is showing up is here to bring you more awareness of YOU.
What are you experiencing in this space?
What are you aware of now, that you weren’t aware of before?
Take as long as you like to be in this space and feel free to share what you noticed!