I’ve been doing these 30-day creations for the last two years now. And I just love what it creates for me and for the people who come together to be a part of it. So if you have not been on one of these adventures, I wanted to share a little bit about this one specifically, but also about what you can expect.
So, we will be here in this group, every day, and I am going to be bringing you specific tools and practices and teachings on this topic of moving from protection to connection. So if you have noticed that relationship stuff can be challenging, this is where you want to start working with your nervous system, so that you can cultivate this safety and security within you. So as we go through, I’ll continue to share with you more of the science of it. But basically, this is nurturing of the nervous system, and being able to identify those cues within your own body, that will begin to kind of translate for you.
You have to get out of your comfort zone, your zone of safety, peace, calm joy, and sort of activated. So when you start noticing these things that activate your body in a way that triggers the stress response. These tools that we’re going to be playing with are going to be the thing that you pull out of your toolkit, and use to nurture and shift the direction of your emotional being, so that you’re moving towards regulating your system back to ease and comfort space. And that’s when we feel safe, that’s when we feel confident, that’s when we’re happy. And feeling like, we can be in the world so interesting. If you look at the animals, and a lot of these things, let this be a reminder or refresher on this stuff for you to enter into the 30 days, but animals they know, they know what to do. When they get frightened by a predator, they run their bodies, mobilize. And yet, what do they do after that, they shake their body, they shake off that stress state and then come back to that place of homeostasis where the body is back to kind of normal. And that’s what we’re looking for. What a lot of people experience in relationships is that they’re experiencing triggers that are not even real or true or necessary. But they’re coming from a deeper place that maybe holds a memory of something that’s attached to a belief that was established early on in life. And there’s nothing wrong with that, it’s not a problem or bad.
It’s just that ultimately, what ends up occurring is that you use that same sort of emotional template in your romantic relationships. And typically, that doesn’t serve us. So we get to become more aware of this and play in different ways. We can actually connect with people. One of the things that really inspired me about sharing all of this, and how it plays into the relationship space, is that there really is kind of an on and off button here. So when you’re in that space, where you can be relaxed and connected and feel confident and supportive, then that’s when you can lean in and connect.
When your body goes into these other states, like I need to run, or I’m totally shut down, then you’re not really in, you’re not in a place where you can connect. And that happens so much in dating. Certainly, I see a lot of people online dating, having these moments of a shutdown, like freakouts, and like thinking they can’t do it. And that’s normal because when you’re putting yourself in that dating environment, and if you haven’t addressed those core emotional relationship wounds and have not developed a secure kind of relationship with your being, it’s hard. Putting yourself out in the modern dating world where it’s a completely different kind of connection where you can’t make eye contact, it can be really scary for your system.
So it’s kind of learning some new skills to be able to navigate that space. If you want to use that really kind of powerful tool to meet other singles, it does require having some skills there. So that you’re not just shutting down. And then ultimately, you can get to a place where you get to meet people in person. And connecting, even seeing people’s eyes on a zoom call is really helpful. And seeing a smile, or seeing how they’re interested or leaning in can be really nurturing to our systems. So I’m really thrilled to be able to work with all of this stuff.
This is all about how you’re present with yourself and connecting with yourself. So that’s your first step, all you have to do is to give yourself this experience.
What are those things that are coming up for you around this theme of going from that protective mode to connection. Going from sensing walls up or barriers, and stepping into a place of being able to have that healthy happy relationship.
What are you asking for? Would you like to know what it’s like to have a relationship where you feel connected, and adored, safe and secure? In SuperLOVED we are asking for that! We have to help our body do what it takes to be in a space so that it can have that. Because once you are in a space like that (safe & secure in you), the cool part is you’ll notice the confidence, that safety and security within you, then you trust life, you know, that, you know, whatever it is, that is in your heart, that desire is your destiny. And the dating stressors that occur, you start being able to see more clearly how it’s not all about you, it’s just not personal. Like if someone disappears, seems interesting, and then kind of falls off that it’s about them and that you know your loving person is going to be available for you, and it takes you being available for you first.
This class is a huge step. And the other thing is if you are inspired to do deeper work, and you’re not already part of my Super Loved Community, this topic is also one of the most advanced topics that I brought to a 30-day experience. This is a mastery level topic, and I know that it will likely bring up some things that you really love doing, the one on one work on this that can really get to your personal space issues, challenges. Difficult memories may arise and you can’t change the facts from the past, but you can change how your body responds to it and how you relate to it. And you can change the emotional memory attached to it. A lot of people come to me because they’ve had some trauma, some difficult relationships that left a mark and make it hard to trust. And I promise that there’s such an enormous space of possibility and freedom that comes from being able to work with these emotional pains and transform them for good.
What if there really are no problems or issues or limitations? That we can really open up to receive so much greater as a part of this and I can’t wait to see you.